and it begins.

dear rita,

you are such an inspiration.  if i ever meet you, imma kiss you.  

after an emotionally draining week the last thing i wanted to do last night was  go to my "butts and guts" class and get my ass kicked by my slightly overweight instructor while 15 50+ year old  students watched.  and plus, i don't have to be in a bikini for at least another month, so who really cares anyway?  but as i sat down on my couch ready to enjoy the lull of the boob tube i started craving your sweet deliciousness.  let the mental struggle begin:  i already wasn't going to work out so there was no way i could possibly justify eating a small watermelon gelati with vanilla custard.  then it hit me.  i had driven past your glorious red and white barber shop striped sign on my way to class several times before.  

ok... so to be honest, i've only been to this class once.  but if you've ever been to rita's im sure you too can list off the ten closest locations to your house.  no?  whatever, moving on.

i could practically taste the perfect combination of watermelon slush and thick, creamy, vanilla custard in my mouth and with my newfound energy quickly changed into my workout attire and busted ass to get to class at least relatively on time.  

during the class i found muscles in my legs that were not meant to be used, ever.  i held a 15lb bar and stood on one foot while bending over and touching the bar to the floor.  i layed on the filthy floor with a massive exercise ball held with my left foot on the bottom and the right foot on top, lifted up to the ceiling and then (while holding the ball in the air with my feet, mind you) slid my left foot to the bottom and my right foot to the top, simultaneously, before lowering the ball to the floor and repeating 20 times.  (btw, if you want the best ab workout ever, do that one.  im pretty sure it gave me a hernia, but once i lose the 10 lbs of fat OVER my abs i feel confident that i'll have INSANE abs underneath.  or it may just be the potential hernia talking, but probably not.)  rita, i did this all for you.  i suffered for at least 47.5 minutes of the 50 minute class but as i hobbled to my car the pain quickly disappeared as i began thinking about the gelati i was about to enjoy.

approximately 7 minutes later i ordered my small watermelon gelati with vanilla custard from kimmy gibbler (i'm pretty sure that's who it was) and sat on the curb next to my car with a face red enough to warrant a 10 on the 1-10 kathive scale and i ate my gelati.

today i'm sore.  like.  REALLY sore.  and the only person i have to thank is you.  so, thanks rita, for getting me off my fat ass.  i look forward to seeing you next week.  same day, same time.

love,

the notorious wfb.